Change Yourself…Change The World.

This is the first time in awhile I feel at a loss of words to write anything on here. I feel as if I’ve been blindsided with everything that has happened the past few months. Such an onslaught of different emotions and feelings, it’s hard to encapsulate them all. I hear that the first six months of the Peace Corps is the hardest. On top of integrating into a new culture and two tragic deaths I experienced this year, I am excited that this period is over and looking forward to what the New Year will bring.

I am going home to the United States in three days to spend Christmas with my family, and I’ve never been more excited to go back home than I am now. I miss my parents, my siblings, my dog. I miss my friends and my grandparents and all of my cousins and aunts and uncles. I miss American restaurants, the breezy Florida winter weather, the transportation, clean houses where I don’t have to be constantly vigilant about crickets, because with them come the spiders. I miss hot showers and covers instead of my sleeping bag. I miss wi-fi. Starbucks, Target, Walgreens.

I’m taking a little break from blogging to focus on being home with family and re-charging. I’m excited to come back to my life in Paraguay with a fresh perspective. See you in the New Year!

Brittany

Okay, I told myself, I am going to go over to my neighbor’s house and make myself sit there for an hour.

I’ve been in Paraguay for five months, yet I still give myself these assignments. I can’t seem to turn off the hurry mechanism that we Americans have. Whenever I am invited to a carne asado (a Sunday Paraguayan type of brunch with lots of grilled meat), to a tereré circle, or to just sit on a bunch of chairs outside someone’s house and watch the world go by, I am always thinking about when I should politely excuse myself to go back to my house. The whirring mechanisms in my brain seem to tell me that I have something really urgent and important to do, like stare at the wall. I can’t just seem to sit and relax and be all tranquilo like other Paraguayans.

This is changing, but slowly. My hour-long visit to my neighbor’s house turned into three, with activities like teaching some of my friends how to play the popular American card game, B.S., having a long conversation with a girl my age about American versus Paraguayan men, finally given the opportunity to serve tereré (only to spill it on the floor), and sharing merienda (snack-time) with the family, which was cake with dulce de leche. It wasn’t until it started raining that my neighbors warned me to close the windows in my house, and I ran off. When I got home, I couldn’t believe how much fun I had had, and as usual berated myself for all of those weird panicky ‘I-need-to-be-somewhere-else’ feelings I had for the half the time.

While I was talking about this with my Mom this morning, we discussed that while technology like high-speed internet, iPads, and high-tech cellular phones has greatly advanced our society in the United States, the detriment is always the high individualization and the more time we spend with each other virtually instead of literally. Today we Skype our neighbors instead of sitting on their front porches. Things like air-conditioning causes us to close up our house rather than keep the windows open and hear the birds. My grandmother likes to say that the biggest detriment to American families was the dishwasher- before the dishwasher, the greatest part of the day with her mother and sister was washing the dishes together and chatting.

Our culture has seemed to adopt a very type-A ‘I have a million things to do’ personality. A day consists of crossing out a laundry list of objectives, a daily race to a finish line that leaves us exhausted. Here in Paraguay, commodities like air conditioning are rare and dishwashers non-existant. Last night a power line went out in Northern Paraguay and all the electricity was cut here. I spent my night cooking and reading by candlelight. There’s no doubt about it that life is slower in Paraguay than the United States, but I like to think that this makes all interactions so much richer, and time spent together a lot more fun.

I still have my days when I long for air-conditioning, but today I am really enjoying the cool breeze wafting in through my open windows. Sometimes I miss having an iPhone or wireless internet, but I mostly enjoy feeling more unplugged. And I may still have that hurry mechanism inside me when I sit down with my neighbors for an undetermined period of time, but I am noticing it less and less. I look forward to the day when I don’t need to give myself assignments to sit down and hang out with my neighbors anymore.

As my leave date for the Peace Corps draws extremely close (we’re on the 2 day mark here, folks!), I’ve had numerous friends and family ask what most excites me about joining the Peace Corps and living in Paraguay for two years. Equally, there have also been inquiries as to what I will miss the most about living in the USA. After a lot of careful thought, I’ve decidedly come up with 10 (in no particular order) in each category.

The Top 10 things I will miss the most about the US:

1. This is obligatory: my family. Not just my parents and siblings, but my entire extended family. I will miss all of our huge reunions, smaller get-togethers, and the day-to-day life with my sisters and my parents.
2. My two dogs, pure and simple. I am super attached to my dogs, Lucky and Summer. I live to come home and see their faces every day. Saying good-bye to them will be tough!
3. The simplicity of food. Being able to go out one night for Indian, the next for Mexican, followed by sushi for lunch the next day. I will miss Vegetarian, Vegan, and Raw Food. I will miss being able to pop into Whole Foods and grab easily pre-packaged delicious snacks or peruse the local grocery chain for the thirty different varieties of cheese. Choice is something we so take for granted in the US.
4. My bed. I will miss my comforter and pillows.
5. The ability to be connected to the internet 24/7. This includes my computer and my iPhone. I will miss not being able to check my email every minute of every day, or being able to look something up on google if I have a question the minute it pops into my head. I will miss being able to download large files at lightning speed.
6. I will miss the weather in South Florida, the laid-back attitude, the palm trees, and the breeze coming from the beach.
7. Driving: just being able to get in a car and drive anywhere I want to, whether to a CVS or 5 hours north to visit friends in Gainesville.
8. Speaking English. I know it’s something we all take for granted, but I will miss all of the slang and jokes that are associated with the English language. It will be hard to learn all of them in both Spanish and Guaraní.
9. My friends. The thing is, most of my friends are spread out all over the world and not just confined to the USA. But for those that are in the US, I will miss them.
10. Indoor air conditioning and heating. When it’s hot in Paraguay, it’s REALLY hot. And when it’s cold in Paraguay, the houses aren’t insulated, so you will always be freezing. Adjusting to both extremes will definitely make me appreciate the US more!

But with the 10 things I will miss the most about America, there are also 10 things I am VERY excited about for the Peace Corps and Paraguay.

10 things that make me excited to join the Peace Corps and live in South America for two years:

1. Having the opportunity to live in one community for two years and really understand what my fellow neighbors’ wants, goals, and dreams are. This is such a rare and unique experience, and I am lucky to have the opportunity to understand what making a difference means in my community.
2. Living the tranquilo lifestyle; the typical life in Paraguay. Sitting on the porch, sipping terere (Paraguay’s famous cold beverage), and gossiping the afternoon away with my neighbors. I can’t wait to meet the people in my community, to forge new friendships, and to gain new perspectives through them.
3. The simplicity. Not having a shopping mall around every corner, or living a materialistic life that is so sought-after in the US.
4. Being in ‘the heart of South America,’ which means being in a very close proximity to Brazil, Uruguay, Argentina, Bolivia, and Chile. This means adventures. I definitely plan on going to Brazil for Carnaval and to see my 6th wonder of the world (Christ the Redeemer). I’m also up for some rocking adventures in Bolivia, and wherever else the wind may take me.
5. Learning not one, but TWO languages fluently: Spanish, a universally recognized language, and Guaraní, a small indigenous language.
6. Having the opportunity to serve my country and be a part of the United States Government. It is something that makes me feel very proud.
7. Living and breathing in one country for two years of my life. I have spent the past 3 years traveling to 30 countries. I’m excited to spend two years in only ONE country, where I can really delve deeper into what the culture is about.
8. Learning new skills. Building a brick oven, planting my own vegetable garden, teaching English (or Spanish) to children. Whatever new Macgyver-esque skills I will acquire while in service.
9. Getting creative- whether it’s teaching a class, working with a co-op, or navigating through an awkward conversation.
10. Becoming buds with all of my fellow Peace Corps Volunteers. I’ve had the pleasure of bonding on a deep level with many people through traveling- I think it’s one of the best ways to forge long-lasting friendships. I am pretty thrilled about connecting with more on this same level.

So there you have it. Back to gorging on salads and seafood, blasting the AC and snuggling with my dogs in my last moments of appreciating the US!